Wonder Woman - when in doubt, make a TV pilot


This week in the midst of firing out CVs for subbing jobs, I came across the news that suddenly, despite over six years of development hell for the Wonder Woman film franchise, that American network NBC are currently filming a TV pilot? With Liz Hurley playing a villain. Truly a villainous decision in itself, but I digress.....what was wrong with making the movie?

I guess when faced with the risks between a live action multi-million movie or a smaller budget TV pilot, the studio financiers would opt for the latter. However, Watchmen was mired in purgurtory for over a decade, yet the movie was eventually made. Can you actually imagine Watchmen developed as a TV show?

To me the WW TV pilot is a cop out; how is it that nobody seems capable of writing a big-budget movie script depicting one of comic's greatest superheroines?

Let's look at the evidence. Pitof's lamentable effort Catwoman (2004) featured one of Gotham's wiliest anti-heroines without - wait for it - any mention of Gotham, Batman, or even her namesake, Selina Kyle. The only concession to the Batman franchise was a half hidden photograph of Michelle Pfieffer scattered on the floor. And the killer beauty cream plot? By the end of the movie I wanted to swallow a whole jar of Beauline to make the pain go away.

Rob Bowman's equally laughable effort Elektra (2005) saw Jennifer Garner resurrected from her demise at the end of Daredevil (2003), become a rage-filled assassin for hire (so far, so good), only to fall in love with a single father and protect his daughter. Hand me that bow and arrow and I'll find the scriptwriters myself.

So what happened with Wonder Woman? The script bounced back and forth between Buffy creator Joss Whedon (possibly the best choice to write a strong female character), and Joel Silver, who produced The Matrix films. In the end, DC got so fed up that in 2009 they released a direct to DVD animated version featuring Keri Russell and Nathan Fillion. Apart from some truly banal dialogue in the opening scene, it wasn't a bad effort. Yet the Green Lantern gets both an animated movie plus a live-action (released this year)? Nice.

In my opinion, the studios are too scared to blow a huge budget on a female-centred character, after the failures of Catwoman and Elecktra. So they have instead resorted to a TV pilot, with a disastrous-sounding rework of the origins myth, with three Dianas and a Steve Trevor as a practising lawyer. Okayyyy.

My tips to the studio execs for a butt-kicking WW movie:

1) Stick with the original myth -if the origins story is good enough for the likes of Batman, Thor, Captain America, Ironman, Spiderman, Superman...... then she doesn't need to be 'updated' or made 'real'. Sci-fi, remember people?

2) Keep her name - yes, she really is called Princess Diana, but then the only people who would kick up a fuss would be the Daily Express.

3) Don't add in new love interests- Goran Visnjic and Benjamin Bratt could have done with reading the comics beforehand. Who?

4) Hire Jane Goldman to write the script - after Yvaine in Stardust and Hit-Girl in Kick-Ass, it's quite obvious she know's what she is doing when it comes to female characters. And get Matthew Vaughn to direct, whilst we're on the subject....

5) Don't hire Liz Hurley. Ever. In her own tweeted words this week: "First scene in the can. Phew."

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